The Power of Language: Are You Focusing on What You Want?
Language is powerful. It shapes our thoughts, directs our focus, and ultimately influences the results we achieve. As a dentist, the way you speak—to yourself, to your team, and to your patients—determines the level of clarity, confidence, and success you experience in your practice. Yet, many people fall into a common trap: focusing on what they don’t want instead of what they do want.
Let’s try an experiment.
I’d really like you to focus on something specific. I am clear about what I would like you to think about. As you concentrate on the thing I want you to focus on, I absolutely don’t want you to think about a green elephant playing tennis. Under no circumstances should you allow your mind to picture a green elephant enthusiastically swinging a racket on a tennis court.
Take a moment.
How successful were you in avoiding that image?
If you’re like most people, your brain immediately conjured up a vivid image of that green elephant playing tennis. But that’s not what I wanted you to focus on at all! What I actually wanted you to think about was a purple rabbit bouncing on a trampoline.
So why did your mind go to the elephant instead?
The Brain Doesn’t Process Negatives the Way We Think
The reason this happens is simple: the brain struggles to process negatives in language. When you hear, Don’t think about the green elephant, your brain has to first create an image of the green elephant before it can even attempt to push it away.
Now, let’s apply this to daily life. How many times do you find yourself or others using phrases like:
- I don’t want to feel stressed and anxious.
- I don’t want to work at this practice.
- I don’t want to be a dentist anymore.
In each of these cases, the brain automatically visualises stress, anxiety, or dissatisfaction. You are reinforcing the very thing you want to avoid. This is why many dentists feel trapped in cycles of stress and frustration—because their language patterns keep them focused on what they don’t want.
Shifting the Focus: What Do You Want?
The key to changing this is simple: flip the question. Instead of stating what you don’t want, ask yourself: What do I want instead?
- If you don’t want to feel stressed and anxious, what do you want to feel? Calm? Confident? In control?
- If you don’t want to work at this practice, where do you want to work? In what kind of environment?
- If you don’t want to be a dentist, what would you love to do instead?
Most people struggle to answer these questions because they have spent so long focusing on what they dislike. But by training yourself to articulate what you do want, you give your brain a clear direction to work towards.
Practical Application in Your Practice
This shift in language isn’t just about personal mindset; it applies to leadership and communication too. Consider how you give instructions to your team:
- Instead of: Don’t forget to sterilise the instruments, say Remember to sterilise the instruments.
- Instead of: Stop being late, say Please arrive on time.
- Instead of: I don’t want patients to feel rushed, say I want patients to feel cared for and valued.
These small adjustments change the focus from avoidance to positive action. Your team will respond more effectively, and your patients will experience the difference in their care.
Where Is Your Focus?
So, as you reflect on your current situation, ask yourself: Are you focusing on the green elephant playing tennis—the thing you don’t want? Or are you directing your attention towards the purple rabbit on the trampoline—the thing you do want?
The choice is yours. Choose carefully.
